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  • Writer's pictureJoyanna Landes Bejmovicz

Birthday Eve: Reflecting



I haven’t been on here in a while, life is crazy (especially with a now mobile baby). Tomorrow is sweet Willa’s birthday and my momma heart is struggling. Somehow a whole year has passed. This time last year I was hooked up to all kinds of monitors, probably yelling, and impatiently waiting to finally see her face. We had no idea what she would look like, stubborn little girl would never look at the ultrasound.



At 8:42 the next morning, there she was. My carbon copy. As she’s grown it’s extended past just looking like me, I’m attempting to raise the teeny version of myself. So here’s some fun things that Willa can do. Not including talking back, laughing when you say no, pinching, and just all around being the sass master.


She says 10 different words, mama was first! She can wave bye bye, show you she’s so big, and play peakaboo. Willa can show you where her nose is, and is working on eyes and mouth. She eats anything and everything, as long as it’s not puréed. She is standing independently and so so so close to walking.



She still loves to have her picture taken. We’ve been in magazines and rep for a bow company. But her most favorite thing is shaking her booty, and now she adds singing in with it.



Becoming a mom is terrifying. Being a mom is just a scary. I am constantly worried about her and making sure she’s hitting milestones. Above all I worry that I’m doing my best. My mental illness still wreaks havoc on me daily and I don’t want her to see it. Now that she’s older and more aware I definitely want to hide it. I don’t want her to grow up and say “my mom never seemed happy.” I want her to grow and know she was loved more than anything. That she saves me, everyday, without even knowing it.


So happy birthday my tiny girl. Thank you for being the absolute best thing in the world. I can’t imagine a life without you in it and can barely remember what it was like before you. I hope you get everything you wish for, and do all the booty shaking you can handle. I love you more than all the toothpaste, Willa Margaret.


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